1. Act like they have called a celebrity. Maybe an actor or a sportsman.
2. Tell them that the call has been received in Pakistan and it will be recorded for any possible terrorist activity in which they might be involved.
3. Talk to them as if you really know them. Try bringing out some links.
4. Say that they have been charged Rs. 50 for making that call and will be charged Rs. 100 for dialing a wrong number again.
5. Tell them: “Your call is on hold as God is busy speaking to someone else. Press 1 to wait, press 2 to pay Rs. 500 for an urgent talk, press 3 to disconnect, press 4 to never call again.”
6. Use Bhojpuri words or, better still, keep the call on speaker mode and start playing some really funny songs until the caller hangs up.
7. Act like mafia and start congratulating the caller on the successful bomb implantation.
8. You: Hello? Caller: Ramesh? You: Arey Suresh? Pitaji ki patloon ek bilang choti karwa di?
9. If the caller asks for a friend, try telling them that he died five minutes before due to herpes.
10. Play their love-interest or act as if you fell in love with them as soon as you heard their voice over the phone.
11. Try drunk-talking.
12. Talk as if the number has been connected to a police station and the police officer is very angry.
13. Start suggesting some matrimonial offers saying that their matrimonial profile has been prepared.
14. You: “Hello? Who is it?” Caller: “Tera baap!” You: “Pita ji pranam.”
15. Start scolding them as if you are their spouse, for not turning up for their child’s vaccination.
16. Use some really funny Bollywood dialogues like ‘Rishte mein to hum tumhare baap lagte hai, naam hai shehenshah’ or better still ‘Bade bade sheheron mein aisi choti moti baatein hoti rehti hai senorita.’
17. Act like a radio jockey and behave as if their call is on air.
18. Give them details of some random person and tell them that he/she needs to kill him/her in order to get his payment from you.