Life is about moving on, and every person you get involved with does not leave without teaching something. Coming out of failed romantic relationships, especially if intimacy levels were high, is quite difficult for everyone. Your past love was more like a training session that indirectly prepared you for the one complete heartthrob who’s perhaps waiting just for you! Move ahead and in case you are still not aware memorize the top 10 lessons your past love should have taught you.
10. You start imagining things:
Some people stay happy and some, well, they just try to find joy in sadness. If you’ve had an unsuccessful love relationship in the past, you probably would make up a future with your past love in your thoughts many times over. It is important for you to leave the past behind and move on. Do not predict the sad demise of your present love (in case you are already in one) and also do not think about the past one.
9. Be a team:
There are ups and downs in life; there are times when one or both of you are depressed for one reason or the other. On such occasions, it is important that you two work as a team and support each other. For example, if your interest is writing and hers is cooking, both of you can help each other in pursuing your respective hobbies. If the reason for your previous breakup was because you couldn’t get along very well, you’d have by now realized how important mutual understanding is to a relationship.
8. Love unconditionally:
The only love worthy of being held in the highest esteem is one which is unconditional. It is not easy to misinterpret it. The best outcome of loving someone unconditionally is that you wouldn’t be judging him or her at all. There is absolutely no room for altercations, disagreements, doubts or resentments in a relationship when you just offer your love. No strings attached. Maybe you placed conditions in your previous relationship which is why you lost it.
7. Don’t wait to be happy:
Time to be happy is today, and you shouldn’t wait for someone to come and help you smile. Many people develop high level of emotional dependency on their lovers. Emotional dependency is likely to make you expect more. But a relationship begins to weaken the moment such expectations are not met, even once or twice.
6. Some relationships are not forever:
As soon as you accept the fact that some relationships are just bound to be temporary, you can stop fretting over things that went wrong. Walking past blame-games and guilt-trips is extremely important. No matter what the underlying reason for the failure of your relationship was, it is important to recognize the truth that if two personalities do not align well with each other, they’re better separated than united.
5. Learn quickly and apply immediately:
Breakups do not happen without a reason in most cases. For many people in love, these reasons are just silly or downright stupid. If you’ve come to understand that he or she doesn’t want you to get drunk every night, you better mend your ways immediately or take him or her into confidence. You must apply each lesson you learn on the way before you find yourself on the edge.
4. Communicate regularly:
Most relationships often end when either one of the partners fails to communicate properly. Misunderstandings should have no place in a romantic relationship. Love is a pure and divine emotion. Even the slightest of doubts can shake it up. Instead of frowning over a partner’s doubt, fear or allegation, it is important to quietly understand his or her predicament. A hug and kiss followed by a brief explanation can always help.
3. Respect him or her as an individual:
Yes, there are hardly any reasons that you can list for being in love with someone. One moment you feel the spark in your heart and the next, you know you’re in love. But it is easy to undermine his or her individuality when in love. Just as you do not interfere with personal beliefs, wishes and issues of even a best friend or sibling, it is important to give the same space to your lover, too.
2. Let it go:
This is the hardest lesson to learn from past love. Letting go is very difficult, especially if you’ve not found someone special again. Past love, if you fail to forget it, stays in your heart disguised as a sweet memory. It would make you feel cherished and grateful but will actually stop you from building new relationships. Letting go is what empowers you to create a new and maybe even better relationship.
1. Be yourself:
There is no point of changing your opinions or beliefs just to please him or her. In the long run, it doesn’t really help. When you’re in love, the most you can do is to gladly disagree with him or her. Be yourself and let your partner do the same. Do not force your ideas and opinions on your partner either. A loving relationship lasts forever only when two people accept each other completely, no questions asked.