Okay, granted that some women really do feel like their husbands are the devil incarnate, I don’t think anyone takes it quite to the level that a woman, Isabella Miroslav, in Texas does. So…the devil didn’t go to Georgia, he went to Texas.
Miroslav is a Satanist. According to her, one night after she finished praying to Satan, he appeared before her, asked her to take her clothes off and then proceeded to become her baby daddy.
So Satan is either voyeuristic or rather polite. Or maybe even lazy. Who knows, maybe Miroslav was wearing a shirt with lots of buttons and Satan went, “Like I’ve come up from Hell to spend time on buttons!”
Anyhow, the pregnant woman claims that Satan’s son will become the American President at age 12 and will create a one world government because apparently National boundaries really confuse Satan.
According to Miroslav, God and the devil are rather like Pokémon collectors. So whoever has the most souls can unleash their powers and destroy their opponent. Satan plans to weaken Jesus, invade Heaven and kill all the angels and God.
Satan, his demons, his son and Miroslav will relocate to heaven while everybody heads to hell. People who have accepted Satan as their God, and animals, will live on earth.
Real Estate is really risky business. And when it comes to the prime property of Heaven, that exclusive set-up where few can dream of going, it’s not hard to imagine war breaking out over it. So Miroslav invites you to be a Satanist, but you still won’t get to Heaven; you’ll just be spared being sent to hell.
The child’s name is going to be Satan Jr. and we can all assume that the poor kid is going to be tortured in school. But since he’s you-know-who’s son, I’m guessing he’ll torture people right back.
To make sure he gets a head start, Satan has already impregnated Miroslav; so when Satan’s son will be a 12-year-old American President, Jesus will be born – according to Miroslav’s information. There has been some concern about Miroslav’s life because of her claims.