1. People asking you when you’re getting married
Definitely the most annoying part of the whole occasion is when random and not-so-random people keep asking you when you’ll tie the knot. And no one gets your joke about not wanting to hang yourself.
2. Judgment being passed on your outfit
Are you trying to outshine the bride?!! Can’t you dress up more glam for such a momentous occasion?? All this while, married ladies will be in even more outrageous clothes.
3. People trying to set you up with some guy
All of a sudden someone will appear before you and introduce you to some chap and then wander away, leaving you feeling awkward and trying to think of an excuse that will help you get away.
4. Being a third wheel at some point
Somewhere in the middle of the reception, you’ll find yourself standing with a couple who’re either sickeningly lovey-dovey or who seem to hate each other. So you’re either hearing praises or accusations. And you couldn’t care less.
5. People assuming you must be feeling bad
Someone will come over and try to console you by saying, “Don’t feel bad; your day will come too.” And they will not believe your sincere statements about being happy for the newly-married couple…and yourself.
6. Getting saddled with babysitting jobs
People who’ve spent ages trying to convince you that kids are the best thing EVER, will leave their kids with you while they go dance, socialize, or try to escape to another country. So you’re stuck with the brats.
7. Being labeled an attention whore if you dance
If you decide to have a good time on the dance floor, people will stare and pass judgments. Since no man has claimed you yet, you’re expected to not laugh too loud or dance too hard. Don’t be too happy with a man!
8. Being labeled boring if you don’t dance
If you decide that the seat is the safest place for you to stay, despite attempts to get you to participate in all the marriage theatrics, you’re one boring chica. How boring old you will manage to get a man will be a sad topic.
9. Being sent on last-minute errands
It’s possible that for some elders, you’re like ‘one of the boys’ if you’re unmarried. You’ll be running around here and there, carrying things and passing messages, while hitched dames sit and gossip.
10. Having a ‘missed connection’ moment
You met someone nice and interesting but you didn’t really find out his name or anything about him. You mentally give him up because you know asking anyone about him will turn into a big deal, and you’re not sure he’s worth the drama.
11. Avoiding guys like the plague
Not because you’re anti-man, but because even a polite, “Hi. How’re you doing?” can be misinterpreted by both the guy and everyone around as a massive sign of interest in ‘catching’ him. You can do without the nudges, winks or stares.
12. Being aware of eagle-eyed aunties all the time
Whether they think you might be okay for their sons or that you might be bad for their sons, some aunties will spend the evening following your every move, and asking people about you. They’re like the Betal to your Vikram.
13. People assuming you put your career first
Now you could be unmarried because you haven’t met a great guy or because you’ve had bad luck in love, but people will tell you to stop focusing so much on your career. It’s a polite way of saying, “Be less of a bitch.”
14. Playing hide and seek with horny guys
A single girl is like a magnet for drunk and horny chaps. You have to treat the reception space as a battle ground and mark your ‘avoid’ and ‘rush through’ zones. If you can’t expertly maneuver your way, you’ll be facing a gropey creep.