If Those Were Deepika Padukone’s “Choices”, We Cannot Blame Men For Theirs

9:05 pm 31 Mar, 2015


This is a part of an article written by Deepika Bhardwaj on her blog ‘Martyrs of Marriage’.

So Deepika Padukone’s #MyChoice video hits internet and takes it by storm. Women start clapping, even though they do not know what is in the video to clap for. Oh come on Deepika (Bhardwaj) – It’s on “Women Empowerment,” Isn’t that enough? Ummmm….Well I am wondering if these women are clapping because 99 privileged women who have actually made all the choices in life are now talking about “choice” or because the video convinces them that they can do whatever they want since they are “women” and it’s their “choice” or because the video takes them away from guilt pangs that if men have done it then we can also do it even though we have cried over the same things for centuries but now let’s reclaim our freedom by doing exactly what they did! After all the real test of EQUALITY is to EMULATE MEN no matter if it is right or wrong!

I am a woman too and what I write after seeing the video is my Choice. And I choose to talk about choices of Men after seeing the #MyChoice video for Women. So here it is…..

1. If you have choice to wear whatever you want, he has a choice to wear whatever he wants too. Do not call him outdated if he doesn’t give in to your fashion sense. It’s HIS choice.

By the way when did you see him wearing slippers to a party or shorts to a conference just because he had a Choice? (Many Night Clubs have restrictions on what Men can wear. DAMN why the hell men don’t cry for their choices. Also never heard any uproar over Nigaar Khan’s comment over shirtless Gautam Gulati in Big Boss)

2. You have a choice to be size zero or size fifty he has a choice too. Don’t call him baldy if he has a receding hairline. Don’t call him fat ugly old useless man and refuse to take him to dinners because you feel embarrassed. Don’t push him to join Gym/VLCC just because you want him to reduce. It’s HIS Choice.

3. You have a choice to marry or not to marry. He has a choice to marry the one he wants to and say No if he doesn’t want to. He can marry a wealthy chic because he thinks it would make his life better just the way women marry rich men. He can marry a fair beautiful slim girl just like women want tall good looking guys. He can dump whosoever he wants. It’s HIS Choice.


Don’t call him a Sexist. Bride refuses to marry dark groom

4. If you can lie about yourself, your habits, your education, your job in a marriage, he can lie too. It’s His Choice.

5. You have a choice to work or not to work. No one should dictate that. Well, he has a choice to earn or not to earn too. He has a choice to go for a job or sit at home too. Do not call him a loser if he doesn’t earn much. Do not call him a couch potato who is good for nothing. It’s HIS Choice.

6. If you have a choice to have sex before marriage, or outside marriage, or not have sex at all, he has a choice to all that too. Do not file a rape case on him if you had sex before marriage and later he did not marry you. Do not file a dowry and domestic violence and physical and mental cruelty case on him if he has sex outside marriage. Do not call him impotent and cry he ruined your life if he does not have sex at all. Do not get him arrested if he is a Gay and loves men. After all it’s HIS Choice.

7. If it’s your choice to love temporarily or lust forever, it is his choice too. It is his choice to love you temporarily and move on when he can’t just stand you. It is his choice to love you temporarily and move on when he finds someone better, someone hotter than you. If you can dump whoever you want, he can too. It’s his choice. It can be his choice to lust forever just like you! Don’t call him pervert, desperate. He can have lust. If it is your choice to wear a breast revealing dress, it is his choice to look at it and fantasize. It’s HIS Choice.

8. If it’s your choice to love a man or a woman or both, it’s his choice too. Do not call him a namard because he loves a man and he could not gather guts to tell you that he loves men. Just like you were not able to tell you are a lesbian and made your choice to hide it, he hid it too and it was his Choice. Do not cry cheating then and get him arrested. Hiding – it’s His Choice.

9. You are my choice. I am not your privilege. Ahhh well …you are also his choice. He is also not your privilege that he would behave exactly the way you want him to. The way he wants to be is his choice. Stop changing him because he is not your privilege. And if he refuses to change according to you It’s His Choice.

10. If it’s your choice to come home at 4am or 6pm; it’s his choice too to come whenever he wants. Don’t be upset and presume he is screwing women around while he might be slogging in office just to make sure you can afford a holiday this year at a foreign location. If you can have work, he can have work too and he can choose not to come home because it’s HIS Choice.

11. It is your choice to have his baby or not. Give him also a choice whether he should have a baby from you or someone else. Also, when you decide to get married to him but have someone else’s baby, do not beg for maintenance for that baby from him after a paternity fraud. To not pay for that baby It’s HIS Choice.

12. If you have a choice to pick him from 7 billion choices or not he has a choice to pick you or reject you. Do not cry Sexism/Victimhood after he makes his choice. It’s HIS Choice.

13. Your pleasures (to do whatever you want without caring a zilch about others) is their pain. Just like their pleasures are your pain! You make your choice to have your pleasures. Don’t be in pain when they indulge in their pleasures without caring about your pain. It’s HIS Choice.

14. Take it with panache when he treats you as a snowflake and not the snowfall. Because how he treats you it’s HIS Choice.

15. He has his choice. He can choose to empathize or be indifferent to you, your pain, your existence and your “womanhood. It’s HIS Choice.

16. If he drinks and gets sloshed – don’t call him an alcoholic because it’s HIS Choice.

If you are a teetotaller it’s not his mistake.

17. If he doesn’t drink nor has non vegetarian – don’t mock him of being old fashioned because it’s HIS Choice.

If you drink alcohol and he doesn’t it is not his mistake.

18. If he works out in the gym for two hours while you would want him to be at home to take care of babies, do not call him irresponsible because he can make a choice to baby sit or hit the gym. It’s HIS Choice.

At least he is not running away with the gym instructors and then asking half property! Getting cosy With Personal Trainers

19. If he goes out and chats with other women, do not call him a flirt and other names. It is his choice to interact with anyone who he wants. Talking to whom, at what time, with how many, for how long it’s HIS Choice.

20. If it’s your choice to call anyone bastard, mother fucker, dick, show them middle fingers, they have the choice to give back the same to you too. Don’t cry Victim then because you are a woman. How he talks to you it’s HIS Choice.

21. If you slapped a man first, he should slap you back because it’s HIS Choice.

How can she slap?

22. Respect is not earned by Gender, it’s earned by who you are. If he doesn’t respect you for who you are – it’s HIS Choice.

23. If you have a choice to accept AIB Roast and laugh out loud on the jokes, the journalist also has a choice to publish the story in the way he wants. It’s HIS Choice!!!!

Follow Deepika Bhardwaj on Facebook.


This article has been reproduced in part with the writer’s permission. To read the entire article, please visit Deepika’s blog.

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