“Daraa rahe ho ki tamasha bana rahe ho!?” (Are you trying to scare me or are you making a fool of yourself?)
The last time I entered a movie hall for a Bollywood horror movie a little late, I thought I had entered a comedy screening by mistake. The laughs were that loud and that frequent. There is something amiss about Bollywood Horror films and here are the reasons why!
Stereotypical Characters: All Horror movies are made with the same kind of characters. The problem with Bollywood is, it takes it to a mind numbing level of predictability. Stereotypical characters of Bollywood Horror Films, in no particular order!
1. A group of over-adventurous youngsters
2. A scared lady
3. A horny couple
4. The non-believer hero
5. Horror Fodder – people we know are going to die
6. The Revealer – Old guy who warns/knows the whole story
7. The Tantric
8. The Psychologist
9. The Policeman
If it was just stereotypical characters, it was one thing, but there is a whole host of things that tend to go wrong only with Bollywood Horror Films!
10. Newbie Directors
For some reason, Bollywood Horror Films are treated like B-Grade films even before they are made. The established names won’t touch them and all they are left with is a B-Grade cast and newbie directors.
12. Bad actors
13. Worse effects
If you think the actors are bad, wait till you see the special effects and make up!
14. Gore instead of Ghost
Honestly, horror doesn’t mean gore all the time. With balgam running down the Bhoot’s nose and generous helpings of ketchup and more screams than strictly necessary, it is more like training for horror, in case you didn’t notice they were trying to scare you.
15. Really bad songs
Tell me two songs from horror movies that you hum, apart from Gumnaam Hai Koi and Baby Doll? You didn’t even know Baby Doll was from a horror movie, did you?
16. Unimpressive atmosphere building
Screeching tyres, rains, night, lonely road, scary building near jungle with a cemetery on the side. That is it.
17. Half assed sequels
A horror movie does relatively well and they come up with a hurried sequel for it and totally spoil the original premise.
18. Not enough inspiration from Hollywood
Naina, Click, Raaz, Hum Kaun Hai, Alone, the list is long if you sit down for it. But then again, while they copy, they leave out the good parts.
That is it! There are many reasons why Bollywood horror movies suck consistently. Yet there have been a few really good ones – Ragini MMS, Bhoot, Raat, 13B, Pizza. Why do you think most Bollywood horror movies suck so much?