1. Guys aren’t mysterious and captivating.
We’ve wasted so much of our time waiting to find our brooding heroes only to be met with horny jerks who can’t shut up for a minute.
2. Sparks don’t fly the minute we lay eyes on each other.
Usually it’s just a polite meeting. Even if there is interest, it’s hardly overboard and more subtle, like wondering if you’ll like him once he starts talking.
3. We don’t like being manhandled.
Romance books make it seem like when a guy roughly pulls and pushes you around, it’s so damn hot, but really it’s not. It’s infuriating.
4. Where are the millionaires with rock hard abs?
M&B, you made us believe that gorgeous and super-fucking-rich sex gods were overpopulating the world. Thanks. Thanks a lot.
5. We save ourselves from sticky situations.
It was lovely how every time the damsel was in distress, the dude could always be counted on to make a timely appearance. Only in books!
6. Their first kiss was earth-shattering.
Ours, not so much. We can call it underwhelming. Even awkward and maybe amusing. Sometimes that one kiss made sure that nothing more happened.
7. You screwed us over with the bitchy female rival.
So now, idiotic females who’ve read too many M&Bs try and force some poor female into the vamp role while they run after some asshat.
8. Height difference never mattered while dancing/kissing.
So the guy would be tall and broad and the girl would be thin and small and yet their bodies would be chest to breast when they kissed/danced. How??
9. He understood her without her saying anything.
In real life you can spend hours trying to explain something to a guy and he’ll still be like, “Man! It’s impossible to understand females!”
10. Most of us hate our bosses.
Let’s face it – most people don’t like being bossed around, even if it’s someone’s job to do so. We’re rarely horny for our bosses and usually try to avoid them.
11. Being in an unstable relationship isn’t romantic.
Romance books lead us to believe that having tons of misunderstandings and petty little fights is damn romantic and comical. It’s not.