A child is like a blank piece of paper, we as parents try to write the plot of their life. Play the pivotal roles in the play of his life and try earnestly, till our last breath to make it a happily ever after saga. But, in our zealous efforts to make it happen, we sometimes overlook the fact that the child might have a story of his own to tell. He or she will always want his parents to be around, to see him fall, to see him rise or to be just there. Let him blossom into the flower he was destined to be, with a little help, of course.
7. I Don’t Like Your Gal
This statement can break the heart of any teenager or budding kid, who really wanted his folks to like his pals. Friends are like magnets, you don’t choose them, and instead you get attracted to their energies naturally. When parents don’t approve of friends on silly reasons like the way they dress, or they are loud or not good in studies, they are forcing the child to close the friendship door on his parents.
6. We Never Back Answered
India is a country with multi cultures and ever evolving value systems. Honesty and integrity are the core of our culture and inculcated in a child from an early age. The joint family system teaches the child to value relations and people in the house. If you want respect, then be ready to respect the child’s ideas and don’t brush them as insignificant. Teach them responsibility by example and it will become engrained in their core system. Don’t ever try to snub them, believe me the world is in their hands to share their feelings with, you might be the last one to know.
5. Choose Between Being A Doctor Or An Engineer
Let go of the old school thought of being a doctor or an engineer as the ideal career choice. On a lighter vein what will the country do with so many of them? Imagine if Shankar Mahadevan kept working as a software engineer for Oracle, we would be deprived of so many melodies. Let them follow their heart and mind, guide them to identify their interest from a young age, encourage their special skills. Then when the time comes support them in whatever they want to do. This is Gen X, they know what they want, for sure.
4. Eat Your Spinach, If You Want Ice Cream
Are we living in Stone Age, do u really think this bully tactic and food nagging works with them. Watch closely, the expression in the eyes say it all- “wait till I grow up ”. Instead look for a middle path, design a healthy food diet, with generous sprinkles of food they like. Do not make food an issue. A few more bites will most probably make him throw up and give him a stomach ache. Trust his or her instinct and stop, when they say enough.
3. We Don’t Discuss Sex or Drinking or Smoking
Really, is that how you want to handle this? A parent is a childs back bone and the stronger it is, higher the chances of your child turning into a happy, normal adult. By tabooing such topics, you are forcing the child to pick up incomplete or distorted info from unreliable sources. Try and become his stay home best friend, the confidante he can run to when in trouble, the person he can share anything with. If you find porn on your 15year olds pc, turn a blind eye. Difficult but not impossible, try it.
2. We Have Chosen Your Bride or Bridegroom
It sounds like a statement from yesteryears. Do you really want to do this? Trust your child to find his or her own mate. Let them take ownership of their decision and live with it all their life. Taking own decisions should be a habit that should be encouraged from a young age. Set a good example by highlighting the importance of the institution of marriage in our society.
1. Learn Something From Your Sister Or Brother
Consciously or unconsciously do not encourage sibling rivalry. It is not healthy. Respect every child’s unique identity. Try and glorify their goodness, not their faults. Teach them to be there for each other and work as a single family unit. Mutual respect should be encouraged and children taught to behave responsibly in public. Nagging and interfering all the time, will only make things worse. Kids will be kids, let them be.