Marriage is a socially acceptable, recognized by the state, institution of love, friendship, trust and companionship. It is also part of a divine plan of creation. It is one of the oldest known arrangements in our society. Encouraged by all to ensure a smooth, normal functioning of our social system, a successful marriage requires patience, perseverance and the ability to fall in love many times, with the same person. Marry someone who can be your best friend, yet tell you on your face when you are wrong. The love between a married couple should always be open to a new life. But, to make this happen, you need to learn a lot many lessons, 7 of which have been compiled by us on the basis of what married couples have reported.
7. Spending quality time with each other:
It is extremely important to spend quality time with your spouse. To share your ideas, your activities of the day and also to discuss your future plans. Turn off the television, mobiles, and any other device that may distract you. You should try to listen and not just hear. Try listening to each other without any distractions and have full focus on each other. Plan out holidays without the kids or join activities you enjoy doing together. Discover common interests and encourage each other.
6. Say I am sorry:
The sooner you realize your mistake, and own up to it, the faster you will be able to return to peace. After the realization of your fault, acceptance and forgiveness will make the relation move forward. Even acknowledgement from your better half, that you are hurting, makes amends most of the time. Sleeping over a problem sometimes helps you to see it with a new perspective in the morning.
5. Friends of the opposite sex is a no go:
This does not imply that we cannot have friends of the opposite sex. However, it’s forbidden to confide in the opposite sex about marriage. There are no two ways about it. One should never wash their dirty linen in public. What happens in the bed room should stay there. Infidelity is a sin, from which very few marriages have been able to save themselves. Exclusivity is a no break rule in a marriage.
4. Say “I Love you” often and in different ways:
In the humdrum of daily affairs we forget to say the three most important words – I love you. We take it for granted or assume that it’s not important to say it. So say it often and like you mean it. These three words re-affirm our commitment to love and trust. We all have a deep need inside us to know that we are loved. Think of new ways to express your love. Be creative and be different. Send hand written notes. Or write it on the bathroom mirror. Or cook his favorite dish. We all like to feel special and wanted.
3. Divide daily chores:
A wife is not a fancy maid, who picks up after you. Expecting one another to pick up our mess, leads to bickering, nagging and arguments. None of us want to feel that we are the others parent. Taking personal accountability for our actions is very critical. Helping out each other, will make the bond of love and care stronger.
Money or income is the number one reason for divorce. A cash system always helps build a bright future. Reduces insecurities and builds trust on each other. A debt ridden marriage is very difficult to carry. To have a strong act and be united as one is very important for a secure life. It is important to marry somebody who is flexible and more importantly encourages you to be flexible as well.
1. Learn to say no:
‘We find it very hard to say “no” in a new marriage. Agreeing to all makes a marriage go bad. It is important to listen to your spouse carefully, but that does not mean that he or she is always right. A healthy discussion is always good. Remove the barrier of “no” in your head. Trying to impress your spouse leads to tensions to build up, never take your life or its sobriety for granted. Stay away from addictions.