Our family and relationships is what changes a simple bricked dwelling into a beautiful home. George Bernard Shaw said, “A happy family is but an earlier heaven”, unfortunately, conflicts can turn into a hell in no time. Family is our emotional support system; be it in times of happiness or crisis. There are no big secrets that make your family wonderful and your home a place you yearn to be. In fact it is the simple things that make a difference between family that is happy and a family that is at conflicts. The family that enjoys each company and spend amazing time together will always follow 5 simple things in their life.
We often expect people from a family to be similar. The saying, ‘Like father like son’, is quite far from truth. Every individual in a family have their own personality and unique traits, beliefs, interests, passions and emotions that define them. Family is all about accepting the individual differences without expecting change. If we try to fit others into our own dreams and ambitions, it will certainly lead to conflict. Acceptance of your family for who they are is a big step towards forming a strong bond. Realize the truth that the only person you can change is yourself. Acceptance curbs the main menace of family conflicts – expectation.
How often do we hear the phrase ‘you don’t understand how I feel’ during a family conflict. It is important to know that every family member has different priorities, interests and thought process. If we cannot step out of our own closed mindset, it will be difficult to understand people who are close to our hearts. Keep yourself open to new ventures, ideas and values which your family member may bring in. Be sensitive to the hurt, fear and pain of your family. Without understanding how a person is feeling, you will not be able to lend your emotional support. Family misunderstanding can not only lead to fights, moreover it can create mistrust and distance. Spend time together enjoying activities, where guards are dropped and understanding becomes easier. Keep the communication channel unbiased and open to developed insight into relationships.
Never ever make your love conditional, because family love can only be unconditional love. Do not confuse love with a feeling you keep deep in your heart. It is important not only to love your family, what is more important is to let them know and feel your love. Show them you care by giving them your undivided attention and time. Love also means that you do not put your interest ahead of your family. Love is the bond that holds family together, especially in times of crisis. Love is not what you feel about your family, it is about generating a feeling of happiness, contentment and satiation in others. Love and affection for each other can never be enough in a family; the more the better.
Trust is the strong foundation on which family relationships stand. Without trust, you will never be able to get close enough to another person to form an intimate relationship. Trust not only is important for warm relationship shared by husband and wife, but also for their children. Trust creates a caring and secure environment for children to develop believing that home is a good place to live in. As they venture out, the feeling extends to society. Broken promises and trust can cause much hurt to people involved, breaking the family into separate parts. Relationships based on trust are more secure, strong and deep. Hidden agendas, deceptions and broken promises can spoil the happy family environment.
Mutual respect among family members is a must for a wonderful family. Though we often preach our children to respect us, we do not show respect to them when they come to us with an opinion or suggestion. No matter what the age of the individual is, know that he/she is person with dignity and show them the respect they deserve. Nothing causes more pain than the belittling comments we pass towards our loved ones. Mutual respect and equality, does not allow ridicule or belittling of others. Respect creates a system of family where rules are respected by everyone, chores are shared, open communication is allowed and everyone is involved in decision making and consequences.