There are some bits of advice that only those who love you will give you. And then there are advices so out of this world that no one besides your loved ones could dare give you. Here are some oh-so-bright-ideas from these crazy loved ones of ours that we grew up hearing.
1. “Beta Engineering Kar Lo Bahut Scope Hai.”
2. You’re gazing at your crush. Friend says – “Bhai Soch Mat Direct Bol De.”
Earlier she didn’t know you existed. Now she’s scared of you. It’s like your buddy secretly plans your ways to irreparably damage your love life.
3. “Yaar let’s kill that teacher!” Remember that time when your friend went all Nazi on some infuriating teacher.
“Push him! Shoot him!” We all have that one high voltage friend.
4. “If you didn’t know one answer, you should have asked someone quietly.” If you had super-enthusiastic parents, you’ll understand.
If you’ve ever been caught cheating, you’ll know the pain.
5. “Always speak the truth no matter what.”
Guess they forgot to mention – Run immediately after saying it.
6. “Stop eating chicken on Tuesdays, all your problems will vanish.”
The scientists are still investigating the effects of earth’s rotation on food.
7. “Let’s sneak in the staff room and burn all question papers!!” Even you may have had this idea some time.
Suspension. Termination. Jail time. Weren’t these but just words to the fearless ones?
8. “Get your arm or leg plastered to gain crush’s attention.”
Because battle scars are manly, and because bandages are too mainstream, right eh?
9. “If you know an answer, just write the question again…twice.”
“Teacher kuch toh de hi dega.”
10. You had opened a packet of your favourite snack. You had eaten half of it when your mom said – “…now put the rest in the fridge. Baaki Kal Khaana.”
So, how did a packet of chips end up in the fridge? That’s how.
11. Brush your teeth more vigorously if you want whiter teeth.
If only that were true.