8 Necessary Qualities In A Video Game Made Specifically For Indians

1. Game on!

Of course, it’s an action game but what’s your avatar’s day job – doctor or engineer? What’s the religion, caste and sub-caste? How many family members do you have? Are your siblings married or unmarried? Do they have children?

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2. Jugaad ka sawaal

The avatar would have to be very good at figuring out how to get things done. When you pick up the rifle to shoot at the enemy and it malfunctions, your avatar should be able to distract the enemy long enough to make a slingshot and use that.


3. Super special effects

The avatar would have to be Rajni in disguise. When the enemies have surrounded you from all sides, the avatar should be able to leap into the air, throw a bullet at one of the bad guys and bring the entire team down.


4. Under the table

To progress to each new level, you’ll have to bribe someone. It doesn’t matter how good your score is, can you spot who to give the bribe to and do it in such a way that no one catches you in the act? Of course you can! You have so much practice.

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5. Boogie wonderland

One level would involve memorizing all the moves to the latest Hrithik song and getting all the people on the screen to join in synchronized dancing. One false step and you are back to the start of the game.



6. Family comes first

The scene is deadly, the fight is fierce and all of a sudden your avatar’s mummy comes into the picture saying, “Beta, khaana toh kha lo.” You will have twenty seconds to finish the full plate of food (no dropping!) while your enemies will laze around.


7. Kuttey!

The final round will involve a fist fight with politicians. Let me give you a spoiler here: you lose. But come on, you get to punch and kick and stomp on all these corrupt people before you die. That’s more than you’ll ever do in life.


8. Love shove

In the bonus round, you will be bombarded with matrimonial ads by relatives, neighbors and random characters. You have to sneak away before your kundali matches someone’s or your avatar will end up sitting on a fancy chair while people line up to take photos.

Farhan Akhtar

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