Romance evokes intense feelings. This is something that probably won’t go out of fashion; not any time soon. For someone searching for a perfect dating location, a movie hall playing a romantic flick is an ideal place to be in. However, when you meet the unexpected in the movie theater just after you have invested your hard earned dollars in the picture ticket, you die a stone cold death in a matter of few minutes. There are some romantic movies which can make you bleed dry, really! And they are known as….
10. From Justin to Kelly:
What was set out to be a romantic comedy ended up in a gross torture for you and me alike and all the innocent brothers and sisters. The 2003 trash featured the winner and runner-up of the first season of American Idol. The movie was adjudged the worst ever romantic film ever made on the planet. Amusingly, the director even wanted to add comic touches to it. God Knows who the initial brain behind the project was; it was the worst thing that could ever happen to movie goers. The protagonists are still booed for collaborating in such a ghastly act over mankind.
9. The Last Song:
It won’t be an exaggeration by any level if we say romantic movies are Valentine Day’s deadliest weapon. Envisaged to be a teen romantic drama, this 2010 movie was an adaptation from the novel by the same name. The movie was as numbing as a numbing cream and many of the spectators came out of the movie theatres with bald patches on scalp for the reason they were busy pulling out their hair stands in sheer glumness. Julie Robinson’s directorial debut acted as a trigger to end the movie watching passion for many blameless movie enthusiasts.
8. Love Mein Gum:
Only the most unfortunate must have watched the movie outside Pakistan but the ones who managed to steal a glance or two feel they’ve been cursed forever. The Lollywood production directed by Altaf Hussain and starring Mohammar Rana (the reigning superstar of the nation) was a perfect example that showcased how easily a romantic script could be shaped up into a horror drama. Packed by thoughtless scenes, the CD’s of the Urdu flick should be seized at the earliest if Lollywood guys have some shame left.
7. I’m a Cyborg, But that’s OK:
Much talked about Korean movie directed by Chan-Wook-Park, this 2006 movie was all about a combat cyborg falling in love for a man in a mental asylum. The movie was destined to develop a new genre of ‘cyborg romance’ but ended up as a fatal-fall for the movie goers. Until the last scene, no one was able to make out what the movie was all about. The flick that involved psychotic characters, ultimately forced many, including the sturdiest minds, to evolve as psychotics by the time picture ended.
6. Kitzur Toldot Haohavim:
Most sucking of the romantic movies I ever happen to encounter in the past 20 years of my life; this 1997 Israeli flick could successfully compete in challenging boredom for supremacy. 40 years olds living with unhappy marriages and extra-marital affairs is what the movie was all about. The projection of plot was in the most mundane taste and the movie was proficient in casting wrong aspersions in the minds of non-Israelis about the concept of Israeli romance.
5. New Year’s Eve:
“Forgive me but I can’t take it any further – also I have only few years left in my life” – a movie-goer came out screaming, pleading for his life. This is when the people waiting out for the show realized what the hell this flick is hell bent on doing to the humanity. Grossly misdirected by Gary Marshall, the movie features a long cast of boring characters who were themselves clueless about the significance of their roles in the movie in the first place. It was more of a flick running on haunted background than romance. Actually, the movie should have been banned and director given one hundred vodka shots in one go for spoiling ‘New Year’s Eve’ in 2011.
The first time my friend wasted his eyes and also precious penny on the flick, he was out of his mind for a long time to come. Not because he hated the movie to such level but he felt sorry to have been born in the first place – to watch the movie, one fine morning. Almost every hunky dude in the town felt sorry for their existence after the outlandish that this movie presented to them. This 2001 romantic musical nightmare featuring musical diva Mariah Carey was the worst ever made in the given genre. The movie boasted a story for grownups but ended up being geared for 10-year olds. All that glitters is not gold!
3. The Pillow Book:
Japanese mostly come out with well brushed tales that usually leave a long lasting effect on minds. This is what lead people to watch this 1996 release. Staring Vivian Wu and Yoshi Oida, the movie easily destroyed the perfect image of Japanse film industry set up in the past by classics such as ‘Hachiko’. The slow pace and disturbing characters were proffered a perfect nightmare to the audience in the movie theatre. It would’ve been better had a pillow was provided at the ticket window by the cinema hall management just to complement the title of the flick.
2. The Notebook:
If anything terrible happened to the world, it began with this movie – it’s called ‘The Notebook’. Those who count the flick high on romantic feed are either emotionally stunted or low on emotional quotient. This 2004 released American drama based on the novel of same name pinched spectators more than striking their romantic chords. It actually opened their diarrhea-strings. No kidding! The same boring and age along story of rich girl dating a poor guy is too – whoop whoop to digest; at least without any beer. Long Live Evil – Long Live ‘The Notebook’!
1. Jab Tak Hai Jaan:
If someone offers you a birthday cake with toppings of potatoes and jellies made out of chewing gums then ‘offended’ is the word that you will use for yourself. And, surprisingly if your aunt mistakes it for some delicacy then ‘foolish’ is the word to describe her. But, the movie that was loose on tale and treatment performed commercially superior to others in its league. The movie starring so called ‘King of Bollywood’ Shahrukh Khan and beauties Katrina Kaif and Anushka Shankar, was the perfect reminder for everyone – romance is the ugliest word on this planet! God Bless All!