Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

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10:38 pm 31 Jan, 2012

My sincere apologies to those readers who find this title a part of blasphemy. But with my honest opinion, I would like to say that Google, a piece of algorithm, written by two nerds of Stanford is smarter than anything seen and anything unseen in this world. From the ten points mentioned here on TopYaps, we are only trying to convince our readers that human brain is far superior than any divine entity. So, go ahead and scroll down to know top 10 reasons why Google is better than God.

 

10. Google is Immortal:

Well, Jesus, Krishna, Buddha, Dionysus, Mithra and others have died according to ancient folklores. But guys, talking theoretically, Google can’t die. Google is immortal because it has thousands and thousands of custom-designed servers spread across the world. Now it’s easy to interpret that in case if some servers are damaged by any cause; others will be available to back up the complex algorithms.

Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

9. Google gives you company:

Yes, Google gives you a company. Doesn’t matter you’re happy as hell or sad like winter leaves; Google is always there to share those moments with you. Empirically, gone are the days of child-like innocence when we were often appeased by the presence of God thing. He will come and he will do this and that. Oh, cowboy! Just Google it and move ahead. You are now living in the binary age.

Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

8. Google punishes for evil deeds:

No doubt, the invisible man sitting in the sky and watching you every minute of every day. Not even this, he has a list of certain things that you should not do. And once, if you execute all those malign things then dude prepare yourself to burn in hell. Well well well, we have heard these Godly instructions but ironically we have seen sinners walking happily and independently on this beautiful canvas of earth. Now, switch to the world of Google and check out the fate of those who have stubbornly avoided Google’s list of not-to-do-things. On the wide landscape of Internet, lives of these evildoers are just like number of ducks sitting in a gigantic pond of sharks.

Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

7. Google remembers all:

As a supernatural creator and overseer of the planet earth, Google stores all of your past activities on its monolithic servers. Google stores the WebPages visited by you in its cache memory, and can anytime determine what taste you actually have. Are you still sure that God also possesses the same complex database of peer-to-peer applications?

Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

6. Google is an omnipresent entity:


According to dictionary, the meaning of word ‘omnipresent’ is “Being present everywhere at once.” To be very honest, Google follows it in a literal sense. As soon as a Webpage is indexed by the crawler, you can almost instantly get updates of an event, happening even in the farthest corner of the world. But I’m not sure that while climbing the Mount Everest, your holy lord will suddenly appear to update you about the elections in the United States.

Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

5. Google is omniscient:

Look at this one – “Develop a mathematical theory to build a functional model of the brain that is mathematically consistent and predictive rather than merely biologically inspired.” Whoa whoa, what the heck is this? Holy Jesus, are you there? (this is the first reaction of anyone who attempts to solve it). But when you’re walking on Google superhighway, the creator of this problem is just like a kid, asking something to a Nobel laureate.

Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

4. Google helps in improving yourself:

There are stack of commandments given by God to improve your daily life, thus improving yourself. Moreover, he has also given the “How” option to follow his rules. But it’s a matter of fact that world is growing with breakneck speed and in the current scenario, old methodologies will barely survive. Well, gone are the days of God and here is the time to clinch Google. Walk with time, make Google your God, and see what happens to you and your personality.

Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

3. Google entertains you:

Hello there, my dear God. Your beloved son is asking you to play the song “piano man” of Billy Joel. And yeah, make sure to display the live version of Tokyo Dome, November 2006. Hey, are you listening me? I’m damn sure that whenever you’ll say these lines publically, entire populace will conceive you as a pothead. Don’t worry mate, just search your query and you’ll be welcomed with a high definition video of an eminent American musician.

Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

2. You can see Google:

It’s a universal truth that we believe what we see. And my dear friends, we aren’t a brainsick or a psychotic who claims to talk and walk with God. In case you’re not convinced with this statement, then it’s my humble request to you readers to show at least one path on earth where one can discover God. One path. Doesn’t matter, it dwells in the 78.2% area of water or 29.2% area of land. I bet, you can’t. And when it comes about inquiring Google, I’ve got only one answer – Go to your browser, type google, hit CTRL+ENTER and see the magic of technology.

Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

1. Google answers your prayers:

Now, here is a live example. I’m about to complete this article, and since I’ve talked much about the technology and God thing, I’ve started feeling hungry. So, it’s time to order pizza. God or Google? You guys better know the answer!

Top 10 reasons why Google is better than God

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