A nice girl plays a character for most of her life and hardly makes time for herself. She can go to any limit to make others around her happy. But in the process, she ends up piling up a chunk of emotions that literally kill her from the inside. She sacrifices her dreams, hopes and ambitions every other day. And the sad part is that she is usually well aware of it. She is kind to everyone but life doesn’t reward her for all this kindness. If you have the slightest doubt that while being a nice girl, you are losing touch with your inner-self and feel this abrupt sense of a lack of self respect, the struggles of a nice girl discussed below will put things into perspective.
1. When it comes to a nice girl – “I am sorry” is said more often than “I love you”.
A nice girl will always reek of passiveness and will apologize every time she will speak her mind by mistake. She needs to let go. She needs to realize that it’s okay to have regrets in life. It’s okay to make mistakes. But it’s not-okay to not even try falling in love, or doing something the core of her heart yearns for.
2. A possibility – even in adulthood, a nice girl ends up eating and dressing to please their parents.
It looks like the girl hasn’t grown up at all. And she doesn’t grow unless she breaks free from the illusionary shell she has created around herself. This is what she should be doing:
3. If there is an argument, a nice girl presses her panic button in a micro-second; a nice girl even takes the blame on herself, just to buy peace.
They just can’t accept the fact that somebody might dislike them. Being politically correct becomes their first nature. Well, that shouldn’t be the case. No matter how hard she tries or how righteous, adorable and divine she is, there will be people who will dislike or despise her. It’s okay to have some haters in life. The nice girl needs to go and spend more time with people who like and love to hang out with her. Then, even arguments and fights tend to bring joy.
4. Society comes to expect nice girls to behave like obedient cats; any woman who tries to break that stereotype is labeled as wild.
And to avoid getting labeled, the nice girl tries to fit herself in the cast molded for her. She shouldn’t do that. Making your own choices does NOT mean you are rebelling against your parents or the society. It does not mean you are doing anything wrong. And labels – who cares a damn about them! Those who truly like or love this nice girl, will understand and support her. Who cares about the rest? Next time you fret over what others will think of what you choose for yourself, repeat this to yourself:
5. She has a deep seated fear of not saying most of the things she actually feels. Why? Because she thinks doing so might upset the other person.
This girl seriously needs to be honest with her own self! She needs to vent out all those feelings, good or bad, she has been piling up inside her.
6. Apology is a nice girl’s middle name and her strongest behavioral trait too.
She just doesn’t want to be in anyone’s way. Well, one shouldn’t get in the way of others’ but what if life’s innumerable paths and choices cross with that of others? Those are not occasions to step aside or call it a truce and then name it ‘being-a-good-person’ decision. Those are the occasions when you ought to be strong and bulldoze your way. If the means are right and so is the end you are seeking – why worry about someone getting upset or hurt?
7. A nice girl is so scared of the limelight that she willingly accepts the backstage as her comfort zone.
She needs to understand that if she has the potential to be a leader or the capacity or skill to set an example, she must not give in to her inhibitions. A nice girl needs to let go of her comfort zone and see herself as this unique person who can be crazy, weird, ordinary, popular or anything – it just has to be her own choice!
8. Even on holidays, a nice girl hardly has any “me-time”.
She believes that taking care of the elderly, the kids and clearing up the kitchen after all sleep, is her birthright. After all she is a woman who was sent to the world to take care of others. She can be the kindest person ever to all those around her (which is great) but she must not sacrifice her own happiness at any cost.
We get a life, girl! Don’t waste it trying to be someone you are not. Don’t waste another day trying to do things that you do not really like. Be kind or ruthless, helpful or selfish, cultured or modern, religious or skeptical – but remember to DREAM, HOPE and LIVE.