Breakups are not always nasty and painful but some breakups certainly scrounge people off their laughter, romanticism and the will to lead happy lives. If you are dating a person who had a recent heartbreak and are keen to stick around for long, there are a few important things you should remember.
1. Don’t even think of empathizing with them; they are damaged goods, you know, we know, but they don’t need to know.
Try not to be over sensitive at all. Act normal.
2. They might tell you upfront that they are in no mood to commit; keep your cool and don’t fret over it.
Take a hint and be smart. Good things will happen between you two on time.
3. Never compare this person to your ex; a comparison at this point in time will be lethal.
Don’t cross that line.
4. If they don’t want to discuss the dead past, then so be it; let the dead past bury its dead.
Have patience. They will share everything with you when they are ready. For now, it’s more important that you two share your present really well.
5. Try not to teach them how to do things right.
They have been-there-and-done-that. Then they lost. So please don’t try to be their mommy and daddy now. Just give love and receive love.
6. There is every probability that the ex has not made an exit from their life.
The only way you will not go mad, is to trust them.
7. Avoid suggesting couple plans and drop hints of – where we go from here? And for God’s sake, they will not meet your parents yet.
Just focus on having a good time together, okay?
8. It’s possible they came out of a relationship which began in the pre-Facebook and WhatsApp era; teach them the modern ways with patience.
Dating might be a new thing for them. You’ve got to show them how-its-done-nowadays.
9. If it has been going steady, there is every possibility that they are here to stay.
If they were just looking to let off some steam, they would have walked out by now.
10. Help them discover themselves, from a fresh angle; don’t be a guru, just be there.
They don’t need a crutch; they need a friend.
11. Don’t go around spring-cleaning their apartment.
When they want to throw out old memoirs, they will do it without you asking for it. Focus on creating new memories instead. That’s the best way forward.
12. Don’t expect them to connect with you 24/7; right now, maybe they need to connect with themselves more.
And when they manage to heal themselves, they will also return to their natural selves.
*** Trust in love. Believe in magic.