Moms carry the baby lovingly in their womb for 9 months. Once the baby is born, they nurse, feed, bathe, and take of their every need. They shower them with love when they are growing up. But even then, mommies never seem to do anything right, going by the guilt moms suffer or accusations they face. Motherhood is a blessing to our species, but it also comes with a lot of criticism we moms face so often. Modern mothers face a lot more dilemma than what mothers of ancient times faced. The demands of children have changed and so have the things mom do wrong, but some of those mistakes have been constant withstanding the change and onslaught of time. Let us have a glimpse at 20 things moms have been doing wrong since the time of Abraham and continue do so even to this day.
20. Not actually giving birth to the child
Some mommies really fail to give birth to their child so that they can live as an independent individual. They consider their children to be a part of themselves for their whole lives, making both themselves and their child miserable in the process.
19. Picking up the baby every time they open their eyes
Often, moms fail to see that babies need not be picked up every time they are awake. They need to play on their own for sometime without interference from adults. It is good for their development.
Moms, who believe in certain dogmas or blind beliefs, brainwash their children to believe and follow it without giving the whole process a second thought. Questioning or investigation is never welcome. This is one of the reasons why religion thrives.
17. Making baby sleep on tummy
Babies need their tummy time, but the safest and best way to put them sleep is by laying them on their backs. Mommies blindly follow what mommies of past have been doing and put their babies to sleep on their tummies.
16. The hand that rocks a cradle
Off course every mother loves to rock her baby to sleep. Babies do not need lullabies, rocking, carrying around or any other procedures to go to sleep every time. Babies sleep when they are sleepy, but moms have not understood this simple thing since time immemorial. Babies need to learn to fall asleep on their own, though it is good to give them attention, lullabies and rocking to make them feel loved and comfortable.
15. Water Scarcity
Babies need to drink plain water now and then. Though they get enough fluid in form of breast milk or any other milk they take, water is very important. Moms usually forget to include enough water in the diet of their children when they are growing up. There is lot of fuss that their children do not eat enough but they never bother to check how much water they drink.
14. Hearing, not listening
Most of the problems in the life of their children could be solved without much ado if moms could listen to their children instead of just hearing what they say.
13. Making them sit on uncle’s lap
Moms love when other adults shower love on their children, but they forget it is not safe to allow strangers to make their children sit on laps or cuddle them.
12. Ignoring complaints
When the child approaches mother and complains about another child hitting him/her or using bad words, the mother takes up the issue with gusto, but when the child complains grandpa, uncle, teacher or dad is bad she doesn’t give much attention to it assuming it must have been for her child’s own good. Moms often forget children cannot harm children as much as adults can.
11. My way is the right way
Moms take it upon themselves to guide their children as to how to do things right even when they are parenting their own children. No matter what drastic results it gets, their way is always the right way.
10. Misinterpreting love for dads
Not many moms smile when the child declares, “I love daddy more than anyone in the whole world”. They take it as a competition and winner is unfortunately the man who did nothing much in bringing the child into this world. Moms need to understand there is actually no competition, and whatever the child says, a mom will always be the most special person in his/her life
9. Not building good relationships with children’s spouses
You can see the grimace on the face when someone mentions ‘Mother-in-law’. Moms often fail to build healthy relationship with the spouses of their children, thus creating unhappiness in homes.
8. Distancing from friends and family
Most of the mommies distance themselves from friends and families when they get married and have their own children. They need to remember that friends and family are important in their lives, even if the priority will be given to their family and children. Having their own social life will prevent them from smothering their children with attention.
7. Taking time off for self
Everyone needs a break, but mommies forget to indulge in some leisure time doing what they like being busy as caretakers. As a result, they become impatient, angry, depressed and stressed out; which in turns harm their family more than it would have done if they had taken a break and spent entertaining time once in a while.
6. Privacy please
From changing dress, bathing to having sex with your spouse, it is important to keep privacy when there are children around at home. Many moms do not consider the presence of younger children a big deal and go about changing dress, bathing, having sex in front of them, which is unhealthy habit.
5. Don’t’ cry
A child needs to cry when it is hurt or feels bad. Mommies often tend to get pissed off at children who cry, not understanding that children need to cry to express their emotions. This way they suppress the ability of the child to express his/her emotion in future leading to relationship issues.
4. Labeling the child
Even if they fail to label the jars in their kitchen, moms take time to label their children either in positive or negative way. Labeling a child with any name or characteristic is not a right thing to do.
Comparing the child with siblings, friends and cousins is a must for most of the moms. When will we learn that it is wrong and hurtful thing to compare a child with another who is completely different individual?
2. Futile threats
“If you step outside without doing your chores, I will break your leg”, “Wait till daddy gets home”, “No dinner for you today” are just some of the threats you hear so often. Moms hang on to threats as though their life depends on it, but they usually forget carry it out. Off course children know that mom will never break their leg, so why use such threats at all?
1. Bees and birds
Though it is an important part of our lives, moms hesitate to talk to their children about sex, sexuality and the normal changes that may occur in their bodies during puberty. They may tell their children what dress they should wear, which friends are good to go out with, what music they should listen etc, but ignore to teach them how to be safe, good touch and bad touch which makes a huge difference to their lives.